Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Madonna now adopts village

London, Wednesday - It has been revealed early this morning that Madonna now plans to use her vast personal wealth to adopt a whole village in Malawi, which was the birthplace of her new "son" David so that he will not miss his extended family and their friends. They will be flown in her private jet, initially to London, and will then follow her around the world to her homes in Los Angeles, the Caribbean and other locations. It has been estimated that over 40 people are included in the cohort. Sorting out passports, visas and travel documents for so many people would normally take between six months and a year. However, the paperwork required has, in this case, already been completed in a matter of hours and villagers will now join David and Madonna on Friday of this week. A government spokesperson was anxious to play down any talk of special privileges. He insisted that the fact that Madonna is rich, famous and well connected did not affect any decisions made regarding fast track approvals and the swift production of documentation. A friend of Madonna said today that the popstar had heard from an elderly African woman that "It takes a whole village to raise a child" and so had straight away arranged to purchase one to help her in the task.

It is understood that Madonna has purchased a small hotel in Bayswater to house her new "family" and engaged an "Ethnic interior designer" to transform the building with a £1.5million facelift so that they feel at home in their new surroundings.
PA

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